Three Lessons as We Enter 2025: Try Them Please (I’m Trying Too)

So, as we enter 2025, instead of “resolutions,” here are three lessons we can all consider learning (or re-learning) and implementing (or augmenting). And like all learning, if at first you don’t succeed, try and try and try again.

Here’s the point: we don’t keep our New Year’s resolutions (as a generalizable matter) but if, instead, we think about lessons to learn, perhaps we will do better and do more. Each “lesson” is supported by data and theory; they are grounded in what will help us be our best selves. And, interestingly, all three are counterintuitive in some sense. All the more reason to try these three lessons.

Lesson One

This lesson is “Volunteer Your Time.” We know that those who give to others in need get a benefit. (To be clear: I’m talking about giving to others who are struggling, not giving to mean nasty folks in our personal spheres).

The data are clear: those who spend time regularly volunteering in food pantries or nursing homes or schools or other social service agencies feel better. Sitting on boards of non-profits, donating one’s time to teach and mentor or work with hospice patients are also valuable. So are bigger commitments like going on a medical mission or helping build homes or rebuild communities.

Here’s the point:

If we volunteer to help others in need, the helping redounds to our benefit. And we improve our world. And this is true, whether one is young or old. So instead of complaining or lamenting (think Mel Robbins), volunteer! Do it often. Do it regularly. Do it during the holidays and thereafter. Do it weekly if possible. In short, make time to volunteer.

Example: I have a close friend who regularly sews memory bears for folks who have lost a loved one. Now I can’t even sew on a button well but this person has remarkable sewing talents and she is using them to help others. Amazing!

Lesson Two

Lesson Two is “Say No.” It is often vastly easier to say “yes” to requests from others in our personal and professional lives. The adage “if you want something done, ask a busy person” is sadly true. We often keep taking on more and more because saying “no” makes us feel guilty. We worry that if we say “no,” people will think less of us.

Here’s the truth: the failure to set boundaries is dangerous to our mental health. If we keep saying yes and let people invade our space, we damage ourselves. This is a lesson particularly hard for some of us to learn (for a myriad of reasons). I was struck by this quote recently:

Yipes. Yikes. Yeek. If the shoe fits….

Example: I was recently asked by a professional colleague (whom I adore) to commit to something for 2025. The request was very nice to receive; and, the requested work was/is important and valuable. But, because of existing commitments, I did not think I could meet the request; I wanted to do so but bandwidth is, in reality, limited.

So I apologetically said no, offering (likely unneeded) detailed explanations justifying the “no,” and agreeing to help in other ways and in 2026! What was stunning was the response I received back. “… No worries; we are grateful [for your work].” Wow!

Lesson Three

Lesson Three is “learn something new.” Here’s the point: it is easy to stagnate. To stay young at heart and in our minds, we need to remain not only physically active but mentally active. To work better, to keep mentally agile, to be creative, we need to challenge ourselves and take mental risks. We need to try hard things; we need to get outside our comfort zones.

This learning can take any number of forms. Visit a new place that is far away (travel there; see new sites; experience a new culture). Take a course on some subject you have always been curious about, whether that is science or technology or history (among other areas). Learn a new language (not easy). Create some artworks in a medium with which one is unfamiliar. Join and participate in some community installation art projects. Consider a dance class even if one has not danced before. Consider participating in a local choir or drama production (think Supreme Court’s Ketanji Brown Jackson’s Broadway appearance and she is not the first Justice to do something like this).

Example: I have a friend who just recently visited the northern most tip of Norway where she mushed (and petted the dogs), went on a reindeer ride (and fed the reindeer), saw the Northern Lights, went to the fiords with whale watching and participated in a local cultural meal and accompanying storytelling. Eight days well spent. And she brought me back a tiny troll, a reminder that I too can travel to far-away places.

Lessons

I get that these aren’t easy lessons. But, consider this: trying them has real benefits for one’s health. And, there is little risk to trying.

If the first volunteering gig isn’t a good fit, try another. If saying no feels bad, say “maybe” and think about it. Try a smaller “new” at first, like a three hour course as opposed to a six week or six month course.

Bottom line: With these three lessons, one will be better and the larger community will be better. And don’t let anyone tell you these ideas are Pollyanna-ish or Quixotic or not how most humans behave. Do good. Set boundaries. Learn. These steps benefit us. Try it. As Mikey says: you might like it.